My article on self harm in pregnancy in Midwives magazine is on PAGES 26 - 29. http://issuu.com/redactive/docs/dec2010 the article is called ‘scratching the surface’. Enjoy your read and tell me what you think

 

 

 

Here’s where you can read my article on self harm in pregnancy in Midwives magazine. http://issuu.com/redactive/docs/dec2010 the article is called ‘scratching the surface’. Enjoy your read and tell me what you think

 

 

‘Prosperity is living easily and happily in the real world whether you have money or not’ Jerry Gillies

 

 

TOP TIP: for helping people untangle their mixed up feelings: restate their problem as a Question. For instance, “so the problem seems to be: How do you express that you are feeling unloved at home (without self harming)?”

 

 

Remember I said that I was interviewed Thursday 25 November 2010 on BBC 3 Counties Radio regarding Go Orders that the government’s introduced to evict perpetrators of domestic abuse out of their  own homes, here’s the link to my interview http://tinyurl.com/3ymogje or here http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p001xfs2      listening from 2:36 minutes. Let me know what you think

 

 

 

Thanks to all who forwarded links to my Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course or commented on my blogs. We had some great delegates attending yesterday who saw our info online. Thank YOU

 

 

A great Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course yesterday! And taken to a whole new level by delegates’ personal experiences. Brilliant!

 

 

Had my interview on BBC 3 Counties Radio, on the Jonathan Vernon-Smith Consumer Show. As soon as the replay is available I will let you have the link, or alternatively you can go here http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p001xfs2

 

 

I’m being interviewed today by BBC 3 Radio at 13.35pm GMT about the new Go Orders – govt plans to evict domestic violence perpetrators. What are the implications for all concerned? Read more here www.stepup-international.co.uk

 

 

‘GO ORDERS’ – new government proposal to evict domestic violence perpetrators from their homes for up to 4 weeks whether they have been charged or not. Read more here www.stepup-international.co.uk

 

 

Did you know that TWO WOMEN are killed each week due to domestic violence?

 

 

‘The moment you move out of the way, you make room for the miracle to take place.’ Dr Barbara King

 

 

Due to my son’s research on nutrition, and his Nutrition Plans for people experiencing depression leading to self harm, i have also discovered why the doctor told me that my cholesterol level had increased! I’m eating more eggs these days to help with low blood sugar, and hence the increase in cholesterol. Hhhhmmm! More on the Nutrition Plans later

 

 

My son has discovered the connection between diet/nutrition, depression and self harm. Brilliant! More on this later!

 

 

 

Just couple more days before my Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course in Birmingham.

 

 The ‘future of our schools’  - FREE Conference - What do government policies on schools mean for children and communities? What are the long-term implications of giving more schools greater autonomy - improved schooling for all or a two-tier system? Does the focus on parental choice empower the majority of families? What do academies and free schools mean for teachers and other       parents, pupils, governors, staff, trade unionists, local authority officials, academics and policy advisors.  Sign up here:   http://www.tuc.org.uk/industrial/tuc-18595-f0.cfm/formbuilder/112/p/1

 

 

My Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course is just one week away. Finalizing a few logistical preparations. Watch out for our next Open national event Spring 2011

 

 

God grant me the serenity to accept the things that I cannot change, the courage to change the things that I can, and the wisdom to see and know the difference.

 

 

Government benefit to work proposal likely to create great rifts within families and break strained family ties and relationships

 

 

 

The key to success is NOT to do what others do and say; it is to KNOW you can, believe you can and do what you can do to the best of your ability!! If you know what to expect from yourself, you will always LIVE up to your greatest expectation!

 

Just sent off a very slight amendment to the proof for my ‘self harm and pregnancy’ article with Midwives.   

 

 

Just been told that my article on ‘self harm and pregnancy’ will be run as the cover feature of ‘Midwives’ magazine later this month. Looking forward to seeing it and will let you know when it is published! Feeling good!

 

 

Some parents on my Easy Tiger Parents Programme mistakenly think that TEENAGERS don’t want to be shown love! MISTAKE!!  Who doesn’t want to be loved? Or shown love? We all do, don’t we? How we receive it is what makes the difference, isn’t it? Yes our teens definitely want to be shown love. Even just a physical connection from us such as pat on our teen’s head, knee, elbow etc is enough for them to know that we care. So go on – show your teen some love!

 

 

A parent on one of my Easy Tiger Parents Programme asked me if I thought decorating her home would help her to lift her spirits. I left that thought with her and looking forward to hearing her answer tomorrow at the next session. I took couple days off last week painting with my son and I feel absolutely fantastic, energized and uplifted! Feel great looking at what we’ve achieved together

 

 

Just last few places left on The Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course, 26 November 2010, in Birmingham. See more info here http://selfharmtraining.eventbrite.com

 

 

My editorial is in the Primary Care Today newspaper/journal this coming week – entitled: ‘Exposed…. NHS staff lack self harm training’. Will let you know how you can get your copy or access it online

 

 

“Let's not confuse hasty decisions with strength or intelligence. It's important to be decisive - after giving consideration that reflects the time you have and what's at stake.”  Bill Blackman

 

 

When one door closes another one opens! About 3 weeks ago I gave notice to my Aerobics instructor that I would not be returning to the classes. It was a particular aerobics programme combined with weight loss (we are weighed every week), which is just what I needed, however, due to my hypoglyceamic condition, I have to eat often. As you can image, due to eating often I have and continue to gain weight, hence leaving the aerobics programme because I felt that I was setting myself up to fail. That said, the following week I discovered that my local leisure centre was starting a circuit training programme on the same evening that I used to do aerobics. I signed up straight away! So I’m still keeping fit and healthy but without the stress of and focus on whether I’ve lost weight or not. I have an upcoming hospital appointment next month to find out the extent of my condition. This concept of one door closing and another opening is just a simple example in my life currently.

What do you need to let go of in order that you can move forward? An argument? A relationship? A job? Certain friends?  Change will only happen when you create space for the new thing to come into your life. When is NOW the right time for you to let go!? Have an inspirational filled week and thoughts!

 

 

On one of my Easy Tiger Parents programmes, many of the parents are extremely anxious for one reason or another. I normally do my own relaxation or meditation as part of the programme, with this particular group I feel I need a little extra help – one of my relaxation CDs. My intention is to liberate them so that they leave the programme leaving calm, enabled, ready, willing to take more risks, bonded with their children and generally LIBERATED!

 

 

It’s half term in Birmingham and the West Midlands this week. If you have children, how are you spending your time together? My son and I did some painting on Sunday and will spend another day tomorrow. I am very impressed with his painting skills given that he’s only ever painted his bedroom walls before. He was as proud as punch and felt that he had a ‘productive’ day. Brilliant!

 

 

Writing my proposal today for my Radio Show. If all goes well, we go live this winter. Will keep you posted

 

 

Will look at spec for a new Radio Talk Show online that I have been approached by Voice America to host. If the spec is right, then the show will go live this winter. Will keep you posted

 

 

I had a really good circuit training session yesterday evening. Brilliant! Feeling great. For people who are feeling down, depressed, lethargic – exercise is a great medicine. Check it out! Fantastic medicine for people who value their bodies

 

 

I’m in the middle of re-drafting my editorial for Primary Care Today publication.  Surprising how much time writing articles and editorials can take! However, persevering!

 

 

Awful news – mother commits suicide following her son’s suicide. Read more here: http://tinyurl.com/33cpt6b

 

 

 

Just 6 Places left on my Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course, 26 November 2010 in Birmingham. More info here:  http://selfharmtraining.eventbrite.com

 

 

 

 

 

Just 6 Places left on my Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course, 26 November 2010 in Birmingham. More info here:  http://selfharmtraining.eventbrite.com

 

 

Now in the middle of drafting an editorial for the Primary Care Today publication, due to be published November 2010, which will also be available online. Will keep you posted about how you can access it

 

 

Just signed another contract for my ‘Self Harm & Pregnancy’ article with the Royal College of Midwives ‘Midwives’ magazine. Publication due in November 2010. Yippeeee!  

 

 

I’ve got some really anxious parents on one of my new Easy Tiger Parents’ Programmes! I normally do my own relaxing and meditation exercises as part of the programme with parents, however with this particular group of parents, I think some extra help is needed – one of relaxation CDs as well. The calmer they are, the more they’ll be able to absorb and make the most of the tools and solutions from the programme. Looking forward to it!

 

 

Full of beans and energy these days, now that I am able to get back to my exercises after my mini op. Feeling great! This is a great testimony for anyone feeling low in energy or lethargic – start exercising and notice the difference it makes in your energy levels and mindset.

 

 

Here what young people have to say about how our society is failing them regarding mental health issues    http://tinyurl.com/22w49ny

Places are filling up, however, we still have some places left on The Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course, 26 November 2010.  Secure your place now to avoid disappointment http://selfharmtraining.eventbrite.com

 

“Most people’s lives are a direct reflection of the expectations of their peer group.” Tony Robbins. Basically, choose your environment and choose your friends!

 

 

Another 2 delegates from London signed up today for The Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course, 26 November 2010. check it out here: http://selfharmtraining.eventbrite.com

 

 

“The first step in the acquisition of wisdom is silence, the second listening, the third memory, the fourth practice, the fifth teaching others.” Solomon Ibn Gabriol

 

 

Waiting for two Registration Forms from London today for The Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course, 26 November

 

 

Focusing on my articles for Midwifery journals regarding self harm in pregnancy or post birth

 

 

Will be sorting out train and accommodation arrangements today for my self harm training events in Kent end of the month

 

 

The Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course taking place Friday 26 November 2010, Birmingham. Find out more here http://selfharmtraining.eventbrite.com

 

 

 

 

Did you know that nearly half a million children and young people under 15 are kept on the UK’s National DNA database? Whether they were charged or convicted of an offence or not. Read more here www.stepup-international.co.uk/news

 

 

I’m all for the Pope lifting the ban on priests celibacy. If this will stop more children being abused – then please lift the ban! What are your thoughts?

 

 

What’s the difference between self harm and suicide? www.stepup-international.co.uk

 

 

Celebrities and Self-Harm

The star of N Dubz, Tulisa has revealed that in her teenage years she turned to self-harm.

Tulisa on stage

In the BBC 3 documentary following the current success of the band, Tulisa shared the struggles that she coped with in her teenage years.  She was a carer for her mother who was dealing with a mental illness.

Page from Tulisa's diary

She expresses how she desperately wanted to help but felt helpless.  As a thirteen year old she struggled to cope and used self-harm to minimise the feelings of stress.

Tulisa shared some pages of the diary she kept as a teenager.  One shows the smeared blood that she wiped onto the page after injury.  It says "This is my blood.  This is what life has done to me."

Tulisa is not the first celebrity to admit to using self-harm as a coping strategy.  Actress, Angelina Jolie has told interviewers that she self-injured because she was "trying to feel something".  She went on to say that "you get this romantic thing about blood and I really hurt myself."

Angelina Jolie

These celebrities show that those that we aspire to and look up to, are equally as human as ourselves.  It also makes it very clear that self-harm is not an act undertaken by those with mental illness in all cases.  There is no stereotype or group that self-harm is restricted to.  Anybody coping with a situation that is causing emotional pressure could rely on self-harm as a way of dealing with the problem.

The NHS is Not Coping

It has finally been brought to the attention of the national media that the NHS is not dealing with self-harm and self-injury cases effectively.  The Guardian, along with the BBC recognise the seriousness of the issue.  Follow the links for further information.


Step Up! International will be publishing our own research findings on the issue in September.

Understanding Self-Harm

Self-harm or self-injury refers to someone hurting or harming themselves.  In this context the term is referring to an intentional act.  In some instances it can appear to be done coolly, however it is usually done whilst in a state of high emotion.  This makes it a more relevant issue for midwives because during pregnancy there are many issues, both physiologically and psychologically, that may cause the emotions of the pregnant woman to be heightened.

For all people the act of self-harm is seen to affect the person in three main ways: The body, the self and society.  In the case of a pregnant mother these effecting factors may be intensified.

The Body

The dramatic changes which take place in the female form, enlarging its size and causing the body to be disproportionate can be a distressing time.  Babiker and Arnold (1997), found that many women perceived their own body as something alien and separate from themselves, with the introduction of pregnancy this is spiralled to an extreme perception.

Another factor is the loss of ownership of the body.  Another human occupying space which was once owned by the mother, and is now shared, can be a worrying physiological change to deal with for a woman.

The Self

The perception of the self can be altered by pregnancy.  It may trigger memories from past events which have influenced the mother, but have been stored away in memories.  Women that have been subjected to abuse in their earlier life may be forced to remember these old anxieties as they face the responsibility of having a child.

Babiker, Pontin, Cottrell and Oke (2009) refer to self-injury being used as a way of coping with sexual feelings.  They recognise that being pregnant is an overt signal of sexuality and sexual activity.  This can change a woman’s perception of the self because the perceptions of society may be altered by this knowledge.

Society

The Western culture that we are a part of places pressure to act and behave in certain ways.  The expectations that society hold of western women are increased when they are pregnant.  The expectation to look after the body, whether through the in-take of food or staying away from smoking areas, creates additional pressures on the mother.

The Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course

For further information on prices and how the course could benefit you, click here.

The Effects of Bullying

It is a perception seemingly known by many, that the bully often goes on to bully others.  This is a perception often reinforced by Hollywood and the media, whereby the fall of the bully is shown through the bringing to light of his/her past.

As is often the case with Hollywood representations, this is not always a realistic portrayal.

People make unconscious decisions to either externalise or internalise their emotions.  In many situations, the emotions that result from being bullied are internalised, however, as pressure builds a release is needed.  An externalisation of emotion is needed.  This externalisation is manifested in many forms.  One example, as mentioned, is to externalise the emotion and to project negative emotions onto other people.  This is how a bully is often perceived; as projecting negative emotions onto other individuals.

The use of self harm as an externalisation of negative emotions, is generically less understood, and carries with it a high level of stigma and many more negative implications.  However, it is quite possibly a more likely result to inflict this externalisation onto the self than onto others.

Self harm as a result of bullying is an issue that needs to be addressed, especially in the context of adolescents as this age group is far more influential.

In relation to bullying as a cause of self harm, it is possible to note how self harm is a result of the external environment impacting the actions of an individual.  From this statement it is possible to apply this perception to other contexts.  It is made possible to suggest that self harm is a result of the external environment.

See Step Up! International's parenting blog for more articles on the effects of bullying.

Bullying and Self-Harm

An article in the British Journal of Clynical Psychology looks to prove the link between bullying and self-harm in adolescents.

FREE Health Exhibition

I have a HEALTH DAY exhibition coming up Saturday 19 June 2010 promoting self harm awareness for adults and young people. 

It’s at Menzies High School, Clarkes Lane, West Bromwich, West Midlands, B71 2BX. 

Do come along and find out more and tell others who might be able to benefit from this FREE event. Hope to see you there.

Meeting 'Her Majesty'

Got a meeting early July 2010 with HMYOI (Her Majesty's Young Offender Institution) in Kent with ‘Her Majesty’.

Tele-Seminar Part 2

Self Harm Awareness and Self Harm Training Tele-Seminar PART 2 taking place tonight at 20.00 GMT.

Self Harm and Suicide

The media has made it clear that in the case of Derrick Bird, self harm was no longer functioning properly as a coping mechanism.  His history of self harm was visible on his arms which were scarred with marks of his cutting.  He had reached a mental stage where he was no longer able to cope.  His coping strategy was no longer working for him effectively.  Bird had taken a big leap from having difficulties coping to being unable to cope.  The Express wrote on his attempt to commit suicide prior to his multiple murders and suicide.  This was prevented by friends.  

The question to be asked is when does the act of self harm become an attempt to commit suicide?  And how strongly are these two linked?  Is suicide a risk taken when self harming or is it the desired outcome?

The easiest answer would be to say that it is different for each scenario, which it undoubtedly is.  However, this question is one that should be approached, especially by organisations such as the NHS, who work to keep the nation healthy.  A one size fits all action will not work in such a complex scenario.   

If self harm was seen as an attempt to commit suicide in every scenario, this could cause further problems.  For many the act of self harm is used to cope with situations that are otherwise too difficult to comprehend.  

However, the case of Derrick Bird has brought to everyone's attention, the possible problems which can result from the provision of support being lacking.  Claims were documented in The Express that Bird visited West Cumberland Hospital in Whitehaven.  He was told that he needed to see his GP "for that kind of thing."  It seems that the NHS is not able, or ineffectively organised to deal with health issues that stem from the psychological.

In late Summer, Step Up! International will be publishing findings on the way self harm is dealt with in the NHS in the Birmingham area.

If nothing else the case of Derrick Bird demonstrates the need for an organisation like Step Up! International, a specialised company, equipped to deal with the issue of self harm from a psychological perspective.

Journal Articles

I have been invited to write an article for The Practising Midwife and The Royal College of Midwives journals. Deadline is early July.

Just 3 and a half hours until Part 1 of Self Harm Awareness & Self Harm Training. A Tele-conference/Tele-seminar for parents http://selfharmawareness.eventbrite.com

Tele-Seminar Tonight (Part 1)

Part 1 of  Self Harm Awareness and Self Harm Training Tele-Seminar takes place tonight. You still have time to join us. More info here:    http://selfharmawareness.eventbrite.com.  

Step Up! International is the first company to provide self harm awareness and self harm training for parents and their families. This is becoming even more crucial and the Derrick Bird experience is a classic example of it’s necessity.

‘Deal with yourself as an individual worthy of respect and make everyone else deal with you the same way’.    Nikki Giovanni

Could Derrick Bird’s actions have been avoided? Read more here www.stepup-international.co.uk.  Apologies for missing link yesterday.

Could Derrick Bird's Actions Have Been Avoided?

Today, eight services are being held in remembrance of Derrick Bird's victims.

Despite the horrific rampage that Bird took on the 2nd June, people are not taking the obvious option to demonise him.  Instead people are expressing shock that a seemingly normal man could choose these actions as an outlet.  A former work colleague, Les Taylor, said to the Guardian; "He was such a nice lad – I can't believe what he did".  The compassion of those involved was also shown in the 13 candles lit, despite Bird murdering 12.

Police have revealed that Bird had been self harming for a prolonged period before the 2nd June; it is expected to have been a number of years.  He was physically self harming through cutting.

Police have been investigating the relevance of self harm in the case.  They have been in contact with Steve Lax of Self Injury Support, who stated, "Self harm is a real indicator of possible suicidal intent. We have to have proper analysis to see if there were missed opportunities and in what ways in which Mr Bird might have been helped."

Lax indicates that this situation could have seen a very different end should Bird have received the right support.  However, the problem is that people are not always aware of the help that is available, or recognise the need for help.

At Step Up! International, one of the services offered by Jennifer Mcleod is support for parents, offering practical ways of dealing with potential and actual self harm, as well as managing dynamics in a family setting.  

For full details of what is offered by Step Up! International visit the contact page for information on how to get in touch.

BBC Interview

Contacted by the BBC today for radio interview regarding domestic violence within a relationship. Speak to them tomorrow. Will keep you posted.

Tele-Seminar - June 10th

Not long now to sign up for the Self Harm Awareness and Self Harm Training Course!


For more details and to register click here

Arsenal's Andrey Arshavin makes reference to self harm in a Q & A section on his web page.  Self harm can affect anybody, regardless of whether his intention was to reveal that he has self harmed or not, it shows the possibility for someone who seemingly has all they could wish for to still have emotional difficulties.

The reason why ‘Child Victims of Crime’ www.cvoc.org.uk is such a fantastic childrens charity for us, Step Up! International, to support is because we know only too  well the impact that crime has on children and in some cases, the self harming behaviour that ensues as a result. Not to mention the impact of other aspects of their emotional well being. Check it out and watch this space!

Alternatively, if families wish to attend our day Self Harm Awareness & Self Harm Training event, they can get more info and Book places here: http://parentselfharmtraining.eventbrite.com.  It is not just about suicide and self harm or cutting and self harm, people self harm for a variety of reasons and there are range of forms of self harm.

We have all by now heard about the tragic situation with Derrick Bird in Cumbria. Police have now revealed that he self harmed for years. Self harming is a situation that affects many families and most often than not, families don’t know how to deal with the situation or where to turn for help. For the first time, and the first company to do this, Step Up! International is providing Self Harm Awareness & Self Harm Training for PARENTS or other family members who need that insight. We have a 2 Part Tele-Seminar coming up from 10 June 2010. the Second Part is on 17 June 2010. For more info and to Book your place go here http://selfharmawareness.eventbrite.com

Step Up! International – ‘Liberating Parents and Giving Children Back Their Parents’. This is what we do best! That is, we enable parents to get rid of Emotional Roadblocks™ that might be preventing them from engaging or interacting with their children. We liberate parents essentially to be able to bond with their children, and a bonus for us is when they gain employment, engage in education - anything from basic to university level or create community activities for themselves and others.

Suicide and Self-Harm

Derrick Bird, described as a 'quiet man' who went on to muder 12 people and commit suicide, shows the need to understand the psychology of those using harmful coping strategies.  More discussions of this news story to come in the following week.

Self Harm Awareness and Training

The Mental Health Foundation suggests that 1 in 4 people will suffer from a mental health problem this year, and that 400 in every 100,000 are known to self-harm.

The tele-seminar on June 10th offers you an anonymous opportunity to listen to or share thoughts, whilst receiving invaluable training and advice.

If you have any concerns around self-harm or self-injury please take a moment to see how Jennifer McLeod at Step Up! International may be able to help you. More information.

Alcohol and Self-Harm

The common assumption of self-harm is that it only manifests itself in the cutting of wrists, arms and legs.  There are however many behaviours that are viewed as self-harm.  The Mental Health Foundation give 7 behaviours that should be acknowledged as self-harm:

1. cutting
2. burning
3. scalding
4. banging or scratching one's own body
5. breaking bones
6. hair pulling
7. ingesting toxic substances or objects

Alcohol is one of the mentioned toxic substances which should be paid careful attention to.  There is currently debate over applying a minimum price to alcohol, the story has been documented on the BBC Health pages.  This is argued as an attempt to reduce excessive consumption of alcohol.  

So what does this mean to self harmers?

Not all binge drinking happens with the same intent.  However, it may be seen as a distraction or escapism from reality.  It can therefore be used as a method of self-harm if the intent is to inflict harm.  The minimum price strategy, recommended by the National Institute for Health and Clinical Excellence (NICE), may be "too simplistic" in its suggestion that "the UK's alcohol problems are down to price",  as noted by Andrew Opie, food policy director at the British Railway Consortium.  It is highly likely that this is the case for people using alcohol as a means of escaping troubles which the individual cannot cope with.

The current issues with alcohol highlights that when dealing with self-harm there must be an awareness of all aspects of a person's behaviour.  Alcohol usage may be a factor that is overlooked, yet something that needs to be dealt with in a way that can help the individual.

For further information on the relationship between alcohol and self-harm visit NHS Health Quality   for a study of the issue.

Weekly articles to be published every Wednesday.  Please share your personal perspectives on the matters discussed.

In 2008 the Canadian Medical Association found that of those that self harm, 'Just over half of youths reported seeking help for nonsuicidal self-harm'.

A better understanding of self harm is needed to help these youths.